MORE LIMERICKS - AUSTRALIAN ELECTION 04

NOT HAPPY JOHN


There was a president from West Texas
Who ate Sadam Hussein for his breakfast
But while passing a stool
The silly old fool
Found John Howard was stuck up his rectus

The Axis of Evil said Bush
It is clear must be given the push
So with Howard and Blair
(such a charming wee pair)
I'll blow Iraq up with a whoosh

The devil was coming down under
The people they rallied like thunder
The placards were flying
The people were crying
Go home George this war is a blunder

The President came to see John
They both had been terribly wrong
The two of them blew it
The people they knew it
T'was time for them both to move on

John Howard, young Blair and that Bush
Formed a cartel, a union, a 'push"
Now many are dead.
And so sadly it's said
That they told their own experts to 'shush'.

Now we surely can't feel so dejected
At the thought of our country rejected
By the world, all-aghast
While we ____ed up Georgie's A*se
Just so Johnny could be re-elected...

Says Bush to his head prefect, Blair..
'You and Howard can search over there.
HANDS OUT OF POCKETS!
Find me some rockets...
The bastards are hidden somewhere!'

My mate, George and I just abhor
news of refugees, sheep or the poor.
Why not tell us we're great,
and we've set the world straight,
then leave us to plan our next war?

This alliance has one main ingredient:
A prime minister, small and obedient,
Who presents his bare arse
To his powerful master
Any time, any place it's expedient

There once was a Pres called 'Bush Two'
Who created a Middle East 'blue'
Whose Penchant for War
was extolled from the floor
By both Howard and Blair 'me too'

The trade deal had sold us completely
The president tied it up neatly
We're owned by them now
Without even a row
John will deny it all meekly

The pain of the world it was gnawing
The corporate jackals still clawing
With bastards like bush
Johns head stuck up his tush
We can no longer go on ignoring

The time it is coming to wake up
This government needs a huge shake up
Its viscous and cruel
A one man band rule
To expel him is something to take up

There once was a Prez called Shrub
whose swagger revealed but a nub.
His trip Down Under
caused masses to chunder,
and long for old Moni and Bub*.
(*Monica Lewinsky and Bubba, i.e. the Clinton administration.)

George Bush has stolen our John,
He took him just for a song,
They went all the way
Like some roll in the hay,
He came, and he went, weren't that long!

When Sheriff Bush rode into our town,
He was warned of a possible showdown
Where peaceniks get bossy
And send out a posse,
But all that he got was a hoedown.

We've lost Roy and Jesse and Gene,
Buffalo Bill and Cheyenne.
But with George in the saddle
There's no fiddle-faddle
And Deputy John's on the scene.

"Coalition less Willing"
To Aussies its less than thrilling
with George W. "coalition less willing",
your war - axis, evil
causing global upheaval
and in neighbours resentment instilling.

A gun-toting Texan called Dubya
Came by to tell Howard, 'I love ya.
And sweared you're my friend
While you kiss my rear end
But the minute it suits me, I'll shove ya.'

Once George, the top man from the States
Played 'round with folk's fears and their hates
Of colour, of creed -
and of word, and of deed
Well. He's got John and Tony for mates!

'My wife and I just love your land
Especially in the palm of our hand !
You've shown yourself willing
To help in the killing
Keep up the good work - understand !'

But young Georgie was feeling dejected,
Iraqi weapons were never detected,
So he sold us 'Free Trade',
And the chance to get laid,
Dumb Johnny thought that we were protected...

His lying was all but perfected,
Johnny told us we'd be better affected,
We'll sell coke and wheat
And we'll just cop it sweet,
While Georgie's wee missile's projected




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This page was last updated Sat Sep 18 22:21:58 2004 Pacific time