oems by Shel Silverstein

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you enjoy reading these poems!





SNOWBALL

I made myself a snowball
As perfect as could be.
I thought I'd keep it as a pet
And let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas
And a pillow for its head.
Then last night it ran away,
But first-it wet the bed


LITTLE PIG'S TREAT

Said the pig to his pop,
"There's the candy shop.
Oh, please let's go inside.
And I promise I won't
Make a kid of myself
If you give me a people-back ride."


ADVICE

William Tell, William Tell,
Take your arrow, grip it well,
There's the apple-aim for the middle-
Oh well...you missed by a little.


DIVING BOARD

You've been up on that diving board
Making sure that it's nice and straight.
You've made sure that it's not too slick.
You've made sure it can stand the weight.
You've made sure that the spring is tight.
You've made sure that the cloth won't slip.
You've made sure that it bounces right,
And that your toes can get a grip-
And you've been up there since half past five
Doin' everything...but DIVE.


MY SNEAKY COUSIN

She put in her clothes,
Then thought she'd get
A free bath here
At the launderette.
So round she goes now,
Flippity-flappy,
Lookin' clean-
But not too happy.


THE DEADLY EYE

It's the deadly eye
Of Poogly-Pie.
Look away,look away,
As you walk by,
'Cause whoever looks right at it
Surely will die.
It's a good thing you didn't...
You did?...
Good-bye.


TATTOOIN' RUTH

Collars are choking,
Pants are expensive,
Jackets are itchy and hot,
So tattooin' Ruth tattooed me a suit.
Now folks think I'm dressed-
When I'm not.


GARDENER

We gave you a chance
To water the plants.
We didn't mean that way-
Now zip up your pants.


THEY SAY I HAVE...

They say I have my father's nose,
My grandpa's eyes,
My mother's hair.
Could it be that my behind's
The only thing that's really mine?


RED FLOWERS FOR YOU

They could be poison ivy,
They might be poison oak,
But anyway, here's your bouquet!
Hey-Can't you take a joke?


SHOW FISH

I found a flounder and I thought, "Swell,
I'll take it to school for show and tell."
But I forgot, for quite a spell,
To take it to school for show and tell,
And now it's two weeks later....Well...
I'll take it to school for show and smell.


HUMAN BALLOON

Hi-ho for the Human Balloon.
He guzzles up Pepsis and Cokes,
Then gassy and bloaty
And burping and floaty
He lifts off the ground, while his folks
Hang on to th Human Balloon
As he scoops them right up off the grass,
And as they sail away
They all cheer Hip-Hooray-
And pray he don't run out of gas.


BEST MASK?

They just had a contest for scariest mask,
And I was the wild and daring one
Who won the contest for scariest mask-
And (sob) I'm not even wearing one.




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